This week's sleep has been wonky. Maybe it's the moon (full a few days ago), or a sleepover (for Eliza) or fighting off more sickness, but our days, with one exception, have been quiet and close to home, with all of us feeling the lack of sleep. Ani was up at 4:00 the morning my dad and Liz left, and it's been a little off since then. So... while inside, we've discovered some new pastimes...
and rediscovered some old...
...including some card games like spit and solitaire and that magic trick that has you adding up to 13 over and over? I had to call my sister to pull that one completely out of our childhood, and she came through for me as she always does, and after the kids fell asleep tonight I tricked myself successfully over and over and over...
This morning we woke up to four inches of snow, all lit with morning glow. It was beautiful. Unfortunately none of us were feeling all that well and so only Dan got out in it today. Ani was really clingy, and both Dan and I had a few moments of "Honey, everyone has the need to be touched and loved, but sometimes we also have a need for space, and right now I need my space (to make breakfast! to get dressed!)" until finally she stood in the middle of the kitchen and said, somewhat defeated, "All right. You're right. I have a need. I have a need to be held today." So we held. All day.
While Dan held, and inspired by this post and this, I went searching for the sun inside while it lasted...I was so glad I did.
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After a quick chapter of Calling on Dragons, Dan went to school, and the rest of the day unfolded kind of like this...
... and finally, a fever and the couch for the littlest of us (aha! now I understand the need!) which meant more quiet and finally miso soup and Life of Birds, once Papa arrived home to take over the holding.
I have been feeling the growing pangs of my youngest turning six this year, and realizing that at some point in the not-so-distant future she will be too big for me to hold on my lap or pick up for a full-body hug. The hours of holding her hot little body close, the tenderness of her cheek nuzzling my cooler one, her willingness to let me care for her, feel like such a gift.
Ah...I'm sorry Ani isn't well. Poor sweetheart. It's so hard when they are unwell.
ReplyDeleteI love that she was able to express her need to you regarding being held. What an articulate young lady. I struggle with expressing my own needs (not to mention knowing what they are half the time) so what to go Ani.
We actually got out today despite it being -22 C. I feel so renewed. Sometimes the great outdoors is the only cure there is.
Sending you healing vibes for Ani. xoxo
ps - did you get my email? just checking.
Sunlight inside while winter is outside is among my top five favorite things. :)
ReplyDeleteLovelovelove.
What do you mean, too big to hold on your lap? And is this the same mama who wants to still sit on MY lap?? One is never too big!!!
ReplyDelete